There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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