Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
