Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
What drink are we having for lunch?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
