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• (303): View more from Colorado

  A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  didn't stop?

  (773): View more from Illinois

  naw, they were rude, not me.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  how do flat chested girls get laid?

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about

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• (641): View more from Iowa

  I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have

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• (940): View more from Texas

  Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yes. It does.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."

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