I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
