Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
