so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
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