OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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