Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Randomize
