I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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