I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
