Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
