a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
