I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
