Sponge bath it is.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
