xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Randomize
