your room smells of hookers.
And success
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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