I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
