pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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