i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
