Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You ate ashes out of my bong
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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