Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
