Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
