just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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