How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
