Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
