the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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