There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
