plz talk dirty to me
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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