i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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