Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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