I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
