absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize