Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I am midnight drunk by noon
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
