Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
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