The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm both gender and math confused
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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