Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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