I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
