I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
