brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
