sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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