i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
