yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
