I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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