All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
