i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
