just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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