he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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