..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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