i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
